Andy Samuels

“Well-behaved women rarely make history.” –Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

Feeling Unworthy?

Posted Dec - 2010

Feeling Unworthy

by The Naked Soul


I was recently asked, “Does feeling unworthy attract the wrong type of relationships?”

Let’s think about this, if you are thinking that you are unworthy and you feel for some reason that you are unworthy of love, happiness, respect, then it is very likely that you will attract people into your life who will not unconditionally love you, respect you or treat you the way you would want to be treated. These feelings of unworthiness will cause vibrations of unworthiness to emanate from your being and you will attract more unworthiness into your life and this includes the people which you attract into your life. So, yes, feeling unworthy can attract the wrong relationships.

One of the keys to attracting the right kind of relationships into our life, is to first be able to love yourself unconditionaly, respect yourself and know that you deserve to be loved and respected for who you are.

Most feelings of unworthiness stem from our past. We typically feel unworthy because of who we have been, not because of who we are at the present moment. This may be difficult to emotionally and mentally separate, for we feel unworthy at the moment. It is important to be able to step outside of yourself and be able to determine why you feel unworthy. Most of the time you will find that you  are basing your feeling of unworthiness on something that happened in your past, it may be something that you did that you feel guilty for or it could be because some controlling person in your life said and did things that made you feel unworthy. You may discover that there is someone in your life now that is telling you that you are unworthy in one way or another. There are controlling personalities out there who will purposely make another person feel unworthy in order to control them. This devisive behavior happens in many relationships.

If you discover that your feelings of unworthiness stem from your past then the next step is to forgive yourself, release the guilt and let go of your past. Decide to live in the present and decide to love yourself for who you are. See yourself as the person you want to be. This change in thought and feeling patterns will change what and who you attract into your life.

If you discover that your feelings of unworthiness are because you are in a current relationship with a controlling person who says and does things to make you feel unworthy, then you have some very big and often difficult decisions to make about your future in this relationship. Often to stay in this type of relationship is to perpetuate your current feelings of unworthiness. To stay in a controlling relationship and change your feelings of unworthiness is going to take much strength from you and will require that the other person is willing to make changes as well. To make the changes in this situation often takes the help of a third party such as a therapist.

It is critical to our well being to understand how wonderful and deserving each of us are! We must learn to forgive ourselves and love ourselves unconditionally. Then and only then can we reasonably expect to attract the person of our dreams into our life!

Categories: Love Relationship

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